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11.03.2005

The Simpsons and civics 

After reading this Xanga entry, the following Simpsons lessons on civics came to mind:


Kent Brockman: And, like Icarus, the rocket foolishly soared too high, and lost control of its servo guidance mechanism, leaving us with some...[checks watch] six hours to live. So, let's go live now to the charred remains of the only bridge out of town with Arnie Pie and Arnie in the Sky!

Arnie: With the bridge gone and the airport unfortunately on the other side of the bridge, a number of citizens are attempting to jump the gorge with their cars. It's a silent testament to the never-give-up and never-think-things-out spirit of our citizens.

Kent: With our utter annihilation imminent, our federal government has snapped into action. We go live now via satellite to the floor of the United States congress.

Speaker: Then it is unanimous, we are going to approve the bill to evacuate the town of Springfield in the great state of --

Congressman: Wait a minute, I want to tack on a rider to that bill: $30 million of taxpayer money to support the perverted arts.

Speaker: All in favor of the amended Springfield-slash-pervert bill? [everyone boos]

Speaker: Bill defeated. [bangs gavel]

Kent: I've said it before and I'll say it again: democracy simply doesn't work.

-- The Simpsons, "Bart's Comet"


Ok, so representative democracy sucks. How about direct democracy?



Homer: Most of us here were born in America. We take this country for granted. But not immigrants like Apu. While the rest of us are drinking ourselves stupid, they're driving the cabs that get us home safely. They're writing the operas that entertain us every day. They're training our tigers and kicking our extra points. These people are the glue that holds together the gears of our society. If we pass Proposition 24, we'll be losing some of the truest Americans of all. [Cheers] When you go to the polls tomorrow, please vote No on Proposition on 24.
Crowd: No on 24, no on 24, no on 24, no on 24 --

[citizens vote]

Kent Brockman: It's a landslide -- Yes on 24! The proposition passed with a record 95 percent --
Homer: When are people going to learn? Democracy doesn't work!

-- The Simpsons, "Much Apu About Nothing"



Sigh.

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